Potty Training Trials and Triumphs

The life of a toddler is full of many transitions. It starts with weaning, followed by transitioning to a big boy or big girl bed and cutting out use of a pacifier (or thumb!). All of these milestones can be challenging, but for me, one of the most intimidating transitions I faced as a new Mom was potty training. When my son was nearing the appropriate time, I dreaded it! Diapers seem like a cake-walk compared to a newly potty trained toddler!

Now, after having potty trained two kids, I figured I would share some of the things I've learned. I am definitely NO expert, but hopefully these will be helpful things to consider for those Moms who haven't gone through this transition with their child yet.

1. Every child is different!! As with anything in mothering, each child is different in their needs, learning style and the things that motivate him/her. This is also true of potty training. Each child will be ready at a different time and most likely the method you used with your first child will need to be tweaked when baby #2 comes along. Keeping an open mind is critical!!

2. Buy more underwear that you possibly think you could ever need! I don't know why I forget this every time. Both times I have only bought one little 6-pack of underwear, and sure enough one hour later, I am already doing a frantic load of laundry. You need at least a dozen pairs of underwear when you start potty training (more if you don't want to do laundry every 1-2 days). Just trust me on this one!

3. Reward for Dryness. I learned about this nugget of wisdom when I was potty training my son, and it has really served me well. This concept worked well with both of my kids. Again every child is different, but I think this is worth trying. So basically, instead of just rewarding for going potty in the toilet (which you can still do), it is awesome encouragement for your child if you periodically check for dryness and reward for that as well. After all, the goal of potty training isn't just being able to go potty in the toilet, but ultimately that your child would keep his/her pants clean and dry. So at our house, during the week or so we are potty training, I will ask my child, "Mallory, are your underwear clean and dry?" Then I have her check her underwear herself. If they are dry, I praise her for keeping her underwear clean and dry and reward her! In my opinion, this makes potty training go MUCH faster than only rewarding for dryness... the more opportunity for reward, the faster your child will get it.

4.Expect Regressions. I'm sure this is not true of every child, but it is very common for potty-trained children to regress. Both of my children have regressed after they were potty trained. For Bennett, it was a full year and half after he was potty trained. In his case, I think his regression was caused by a developmental spurt that caused him to regress in other areas. For Mallory, potty training was a breeze with very few accidents. Now, after she has been doing great for a few months, she is having accidents almost daily. I haven't really figured out the cause of her regression yet, but regardless of the cause, the solution is still the same.

First, be patient and don't worry. Just keep repeating to yourself, "This is normal. It is just a phase. It won't last forever."

Second, revert back to your potty training routine. For Bennett, it only took a few days of rewarding him for using the bathroom properly to get him back into the swing of things. For Mallory, we've started setting a timer again for every 20-30 minutes and reminding her to go potty at those times. Most of the time, just re-visiting the methods you used when you were potty training should help.

5. Most importantly... remember... Eventually they WILL get it! :0) Even if potty training isn't going well, just remind yourself that eventually, whether it takes one day or one year, they will get it. Again, this is just a phase. As my grandmother used to say, "This too shall pass." So just stick with it and hang in there!